Bards and Barrels
Are you new to Dungeons and Dragons and TTRPGs? Then you are in the right place! Bards and Barrels is the perfect introduction to the world of DnD and TTRPGs. With engaging discussions, helpful tips, and plenty of laughs along the way. Join us as we explore the game and share our experiences as players and Dungeon Masters.
Bards and Barrels
S4 Ep. 17: Let's wrap up Season 4
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
The time has come to put a nice bow on Season 4. Also the guys enjoy a nice pint of Bert the Hurt from Junkyard Brewing Company in Moorhead, Minnesota.
Sunny day sweepin' the clouds away. Nah, it's Bert the Hurt coming to run the game.
SPEAKER_02And there's the opening crack. It's time for the opening crack. It felt good. It already happened. It felt good.
SPEAKER_03We've already cracked.
SPEAKER_02How can it be time? That's true. We're already cracked.
SPEAKER_03Yep, it's crack.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it's been dry here, you know? Yeah, that's true. I have nothing to say. You guys are all right.
SPEAKER_01Not dry tonight.
SPEAKER_02It's time for the opening crack, the sideshow to the DD show we normally do where we taste and rank some epic brews. I'm Ross, along with me, Damon, Brett, Phil, everybody's in the house tonight. Uh I don't feel like we've all been in the same room to with microphones in front of us for, well, since Christmas. No way. Really? I think the Christmas episode was the last one. That's too long. That's too long. I mean, there's nobody's had anything going on. Yeah. Sure, you know, whatever.
SPEAKER_01Uh Phil, what are we drinking tonight? Well, we're drinking Bert the Hurt, a Vermont-style New England IPA from Junkyard Brewing Company.
SPEAKER_02What the hell is a Vermont Vermont-style New England IPA?
SPEAKER_01Please explain this to me. Um, I felt like they thought that maybe a New England IPA was overdone, so they thought, let's call it Vermont style. If you put more states and regions in it, it gets fancier, right? People will buy it.
SPEAKER_02Okay, that's fair.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. No, I don't know what it really means. What's it mean, Russ?
SPEAKER_02I don't know what it means either, actually. So, well, Damon, any thoughts?
SPEAKER_00I thought you guys looked it up earlier.
SPEAKER_02Um, all right, fair. So a Vermont-style New England IPA is characterized by uh hazy look. I think that's a big check mark. Uh juicy aroma, soft, creamy mouthfeel, uh low restrained bitterness. Uh it was developed in the Northeast United States by breweries like The Alchemist uh and Hill Farmstead. Yeah, Gemini. That's what I was thinking. Often features notes of mango, peach, and citrus.
SPEAKER_01I'm trying to figure out like what does make a difference between maybe Vermont style and like a normal New England IPA? And I don't know if it's Vermont style specifically that carries like that mango note or not. You can smell it. Like I feel like I smell the mango, but is that because it's Vermont style or is that just like the hop choices?
SPEAKER_02Is it the level of hoppiness maybe? They use like I feel like this is a an extremely mellow IPA. Yeah. What did you say the IB use? Uh negligible. Uh the actual on untapped is in A. That's a weird IPA. Unless that means nasty amount or not applicable. Or not applicable. Yeah, it seems like the more likely explanation for that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. That is odd for an IPA though.
SPEAKER_02It's like it's like you can taste the hops, but I don't feel like there's that hoppy bitter kick to it. No, the bitterness isn't there like that.
SPEAKER_00No, because there's all the sweetness. Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_03And there's all the fruit stuff in it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I mean, yeah.
SPEAKER_03I can feel the challenge rating plummeting as we talk about. Yes, that's true.
SPEAKER_00It has that like IPA dry finish to it. It does, yeah. Um, it has that uh I don't know. I mean, I would I'm a jerk, so I would be of the camp that Vermont style is is kind of BS. I don't know. Marketing ploy. Like there's nobody voting on any of the I I mean at some point there is, but it's just a thing. It'd be like a variation of a of a New England IPA. And New England IPAs are hazy. That's usually their sort of key characteristic.
SPEAKER_03Can we make up a style?
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_03Yes, yeah, like Ross's basement IPA. Like Yes. Yes. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02No, nobody's gonna drink that. Sounds sketchy as all get out, man.
SPEAKER_00I mean, it's just kind of like uh where is it is it Cincinnati where they uh there's something different about how they do chili.
SPEAKER_02Oh my god. Oh, I watched a video on this. Have you not heard of Skyline chili?
SPEAKER_00It's like chili with has like noodles or something or yeah, they want it on top of spaghetti.
SPEAKER_02But but it's like their chili, it has like it's like the meat is super fine, so it's more of like a sludge, not like a chili. There's no beans in it, and they put like cinnamon and like other spices in there. No beans in their chili.
SPEAKER_00You don't put cinnamon in your chili?
SPEAKER_03No. You put cinnamon in your chili? Yes. Really? What? Okay, we all get there in the end because we put cinnamon rolls in there, and so you get the cinnamon. We just separated it out. Okay.
SPEAKER_00Okay, well, like a that's just like a local style. Somebody did it there, and people liked it, and so it sort of caught on in the area. Okay.
SPEAKER_03It's like the different types of barbecue. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Like fair. Like Carolina style or Kansas City style, you know, like it's just a variation.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_01I am interested in like travel up to the northeast and like set a Vermont style IPA next to like a New Hampshire style IPA and see if there's any kind of difference or not.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. So do we need to do like a bonus side quest where because you can buy cans of skyline chili. You want me to order like a can of skyline chili and we try it on an episode?
SPEAKER_01I don't need any.
SPEAKER_02If you roll poorly, you eat all of it. No.
SPEAKER_01No, we can look up a recipe and I'll make it. But I'm not eating one out of the can.
SPEAKER_02No, it's it's coming out of the can, but it's pasteurized. It's fine. You might be up for a night. It's okay. Or a whole day. Cleaning your old innards out. That's fine. No. Uh this beer comes in at a six and a half percent. I think that probably attributes to that nice dry finish it has in it. Uh, any other like thought notes, thoughts, thought notes? Thought notes? Yes, thought notes.
SPEAKER_03Any other thoughts on the tasting notes?
SPEAKER_00Tasting notes. You say we haven't done this since Christmas? Yeah, it's been a while. Can you tell?
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_03Taste the rust.
SPEAKER_00I feel as though we are as sharp as we've always been.
SPEAKER_03Keep drinking, you'll get there.
SPEAKER_00I don't think snacks have gotten stale, but it's also around. Our minds fresh as can be.
SPEAKER_01I don't know that there's a lot of IPAs that I would say I would drink this like on a nice hot day. Yeah. But I actually feel like this is pretty enjoyable. And I do think I could drink it on a hot day.
SPEAKER_02Okay, just because it's here, can you pour me a splash of your mango cart? Well, of course. Because I'm curious, like how because I always thought mango cart was like yeah, but I'm like, I I feel like that's a pretty authentic mango taste for it, is what I'm looking for.
SPEAKER_00Oh boy, here we go.
SPEAKER_02But a mango wheat has that wheat like punch to it. Oh, yeah. Once you once you taste that though, like the fruit's definitely different. This is it's there, mango's in there somewhere, but that citrus from the hops punches you.
SPEAKER_00So oh, there it is. I see it.
SPEAKER_02The mango. It's like, what are you doing?
SPEAKER_00Like looking into your it ended up in my glass. That's why, that's why it's harder for you to find.
SPEAKER_03Also, Damon has a cold, so he can't taste anything.
SPEAKER_01I'm on it. We'll put an asterisk behind your CR. I should probably do that on all mine.
SPEAKER_00CR Zero.
SPEAKER_03I don't taste anything.
SPEAKER_00Just a little asterisk that says this guy doesn't get it. He doesn't.
SPEAKER_01What about the can?
SPEAKER_03We can talk about the can. Oh, yeah. It's the best part of the beer. I mean, 90% of beer sales are because of the can now. Uh, and this one is uh unique, I will say. That's why I bought it. Uh this is Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street, uh, jacked up on roids. Like swole Bert and Ernie. Like with a chain around his neck with a B on it.
SPEAKER_02I feel like this is something Bert and Ernie would do. Like they're they're clo they're definitely bouncers in a parallel universe. Yes.
SPEAKER_00All right, all right. We're going on to give an infinite number of parallel universes. So they are definitely bouncers in one of them.
SPEAKER_02I don't see what the problem here is.
SPEAKER_03I think this fits in perfectly to our next step, which is coming up with a story for this beard that fits into DD. And I think we need to have Burton Ernie doing something. Bert and Ernie or bouncers. Yes. And they are bound and determined to get this this beer that they brewed up on sale at the bar that they work at.
SPEAKER_02Ooh, yes. I like I like that. The bird's nest. Yeah, there you go. Is Big Bird the proprietor? Oscar's can.
SPEAKER_01Oscars can. Oh, man. Maybe it's just Oscars, but they call it the can. The can. Oh, I do like it. Oscars would be a better bar name.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02That was a good bar name. I'd go there for happy hour.
SPEAKER_00The can could be like the VIP room. There you go. Oh. I've heard the beer is great, but the food's tracking.
SPEAKER_02I feel like there's a room that's already designated the can in most establishments, but we don't we don't care about that.
SPEAKER_00This is Oscar's. Are you familiar with the work of Oscar the Grouch? The man who lives in a garbage can? Fair. So the VIP room is the can. Yeah. Okay. All right. Should be the worst room in the place. Where the porcelain throne is. Oh fair. You told me. And Bert and Ernie have to keep people out of there, I guess.
SPEAKER_03And when you have to close out your tab, you have to go visit the count.
SPEAKER_02Now you're still trying to change. You want any counts change back?
SPEAKER_00He's a one. Not two. Not three. Oh man. Somewhere in the distance, there's a dragon, I guess.
SPEAKER_02It's a pocket dimension. It's definitely a Baldur's game.
SPEAKER_01I'm trying to figure out what role Snuffy has in all this, but I don't know. I don't know if he's got a role.
SPEAKER_02Secret sauce.
SPEAKER_01We already have bouncers.
SPEAKER_02Secret sauce.
SPEAKER_01I was thinking if they made wine, he could crush the grapes, but I don't know.
SPEAKER_02So what's the name of this beer? So Bert, Bert and Ernie are bouncers at Oscars. The VIP room is the can.
SPEAKER_00Well, they're bouncers, but they're also like budding drink entrepreneurs.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_00Right?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, yeah. Otherwise they wouldn't have made it.
SPEAKER_00So they think that by working there, they can eventually get their homebrew concoction. Ooh, there it is. And get it on tap.
SPEAKER_01Onto the tap.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Their secret sauce.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Burton or any secret sauce. Bonus crack.
SPEAKER_01Bonus crack.
SPEAKER_02Yes, indeed. Uh beautiful.
SPEAKER_03There's a whole quest here. Like you have to convince this is a side quest, definitely. But you have to convince the uh the barkeeper to Oscar. To let them. We're recording this? Yes. The quest is you have to let you have to convince Oscar to put this beer on tap. Ooh. Or you have to smuggle the ingredients from another street. What's the other street? Lose clues. Drury Lane.
SPEAKER_01Drury Lane.
SPEAKER_02This is a T TV RPG where all the children's shows are in the same world.
SPEAKER_03Oh, oh, this could be fun.
SPEAKER_02The theater next door is like the Muppets Theater. Yes. I love all of this. Alright, I think that's pretty good. Did we actually name the beer?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's that's where we were going to that's enough, you know, helpful information for someone planning out a DD campaign.
SPEAKER_01It's definitely a one-shot. Like, oh yeah, that'd be fun. I would enjoy that. Don't give mad ideas. I was just after the care bears.
SPEAKER_02We should give that to him for that reason. And you know he's gonna listen to this episode.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, he probably will.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Anything anything to add to uh Oscars?
unknownBurton.
SPEAKER_03You have to play all bards.
SPEAKER_02Oh bards. It fits, it works!
SPEAKER_01Yeah, everybody sings.
SPEAKER_02So it's fair. You're the band that's coming in. Burton Ernie are picking up your cover charge. What?
SPEAKER_03It's a street dance on Sesame Street. You have to perform. How many other tropes have we missed from Sesame Street? What else is left? Where's Elmo fit at in all this?
SPEAKER_00He's not old enough.
SPEAKER_03He's not. Didn't he age up? Isn't he like five or something now?
SPEAKER_02Thirty years later, he's five.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, because he aged up because they added the uh the one little the one with the the ponytails sticking out of her head. Oh yeah, yeah. Abby. Abby could add it.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I I'm Googling.
SPEAKER_02In what year? The fairy was she has a little brother too.
SPEAKER_00He's even younger, Rudy. Is there some place where I can find like original episodes of Sesame Street?
SPEAKER_01Are they housed on some streaming service? YouTube, maybe. I think it's HBO Max, actually.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that's right. They did that. Because like there's a PBS app, but it only has like the latest like five. Yeah, right.
SPEAKER_01HBO Max is like 30 some seasons, I think, or 50 some seasons right now. But yeah, HBO Max. Yeah. No.
SPEAKER_03But if you were thinking about it, yeah. Give me a call. That'd be great.
SPEAKER_02So this is this is the kind of stuff that Google's useful for. I Googled in what year was Elmo technically able to drink because of his years on Sesame Street. He technically turned 21 in the year 2001, in case you were curious. But canonically, he's perpetually three and a half years old.
SPEAKER_03Three and a half. Oh, so he did not age out.
SPEAKER_02So he's only three and a half. So it says canonical age. Despite the tenure on the show, Elmo is canonically forever three and a half years old.
SPEAKER_00I think my wife says that about me sometimes. He's also a different species, right?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, monster.
SPEAKER_00So yeah. So his species may be.
SPEAKER_01Did you ever read Grover's book, Monster at the End of the Day?
SPEAKER_00Yes, there's a monster at the end of the book. It was a great book. They're all monsters.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Well, not Big Bird.
SPEAKER_02But not Big Bird, yeah.
SPEAKER_01No. Well, yeah, no, they're not. Grover is Elmo is Abby's a fairy. And the humans are humans, but. What happened? This was a beer episode. What happened? Whoa. 20 minutes later.
SPEAKER_03What just happened? All right. Back to the episode. Almondy DD podcasts. Get on to Sesame Street. That's we're recording this? Yeah, this is great.
SPEAKER_02This is this is gold. Uh okay, before before we take any more avenues and side roads here, uh, let's go on to our challenge rating for this beer on a scale of one to twenty.
SPEAKER_01AKA the number of the day.
SPEAKER_03Brought to you by the little aliens.
SPEAKER_02I did not expect this to go here, but that's okay. Back on the street. The scale is on a one to twenty, one being like creme males, domestics, the like, uh, twenty being uh well, usually like double IPAs. We've had a triple IPA, speaking of styles that don't exist, but there is a triple IPA out there. Uh what are we thinking, fellas? Uh Brett said at the top of the episode that as we talked about this beer, uh, it was uh going down every second that we spoke more about it. Brett, why don't you kiss us kick us off?
SPEAKER_03I don't want to. Um uh I don't know if I've ever called on you first.
SPEAKER_02No, not really.
SPEAKER_01No, I don't think so.
SPEAKER_02This might be a first. This is why you listen to the season rap episodes right here.
SPEAKER_03I'm I'm gonna go Elmo.
SPEAKER_04Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03Three and a half.
SPEAKER_01Oh, geez. Okay.
SPEAKER_03I this is this is like a next door neighbor to a cream ale to me. Like this is IBBD territory. Really? For an IPA? Absolutely. If you want to get into an IPA, start with this one. The cream ale and a little croy had a baby.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00That sounds awful for this idea. Great. Like that is not how I would describe this beer.
SPEAKER_03I mean, it's it is definitely it still has a little bit more of the flavor punch that an IPA has, but it's not it is not that triple IPA or the some of the harder double IPAs that we've had. Yeah. It's it's there a little bit. And three and a half is probably a little low, but I'm gonna stick with it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I'm gonna say seven. What's the finish that I think that people wouldn't uh that's fair? Like the finish doesn't necessarily make a you a person want to have another drink. Is that you know, I don't know.
SPEAKER_03You know, I'm getting flashbacks on this one to when you made us eat a hop.
SPEAKER_00Oh my god, I didn't I didn't make you no you encouraged it, I just told you it was a tradition.
SPEAKER_03When are Ross and I ever gonna not do that?
SPEAKER_02The first time you brew, yes.
SPEAKER_00And it is a tradition.
SPEAKER_02For you. Yeah. That's which is fair. But you may you make I swear to God. And maybe this is just my recollection of this. I swear to you were like, this is like you were like, this is like an old tradition, like brewmaker's tradition. Like the first batch you brew, you have to try a hop. Worst thing I've ever had in my life.
SPEAKER_03He's like, these idiots are not.
SPEAKER_00I think it's a valuable tool, though.
SPEAKER_02But here's the great thing.
SPEAKER_00Now you have a much better sense of what a hop taste is.
SPEAKER_02I do, 100%. And and what makes this even better was the first time I brewed with you, Brett was not there. So I witnessed him doing it and did not say a word. It is a tradition. Yeah, it is two times.
SPEAKER_03It's hazing. That's what it is. If you ever want to take all of the moisture out of your mouth, that will do it. Eat a hop. Yes, 100%.
SPEAKER_00I'm sure that I said you don't have to if you don't want to. I think you said that after I put it in my mouth. You may want to have a glass of water handy.
SPEAKER_03All right, you guys. What are you guys saying?
SPEAKER_01I echo David. I had it at a seven. I think that's about so far.
SPEAKER_00One of these things is not like the other. There it is.
SPEAKER_02Where are you going, Ross? 14. No, definitely not a 14. Um, I I'm gonna give it a five. I I I agree with everything you guys are saying. It's it's I I think you're right on the finish, 100%. It's like the the fruity flavor, the lack of bitterness in this beer, like somebody would take a drink and be like, oh, this is really good. And then it's like that hit at the end would make them go, ooh, I don't know if I want another one of these. But you get somebody that's in the right mood that's been trying a few things, they may they may go for it.
SPEAKER_00I think this would be great with like a barbecued pulp pork sandwich. Oh, yes, that would be great with that.
SPEAKER_03Oh, yeah. So shout out to our IBBDs, our idiot baby beer. This is this one's for you. Hillary, this one's for you. Try this one. Isn't that a slogan for an actual beer? This one's for you.
SPEAKER_01Uh we can't say that. No.
SPEAKER_02We'll pay royalties if we say which beer. Uh okay, so let's go around. Uh, we'll go in the same or order, uh, yay or nay. If this beer was put in front of you, would you have another, Brett?
SPEAKER_03You know, I I would have to know it was this one and not just some random IPA. But if it was this one, like, yeah, sure. Do it. Damon?
SPEAKER_01Why wouldn't you know what it is? If someone said a mystery.
SPEAKER_03I'm like, here it is, here's an IPA, drink this. And I'm like, hmm. You want some? Here it's a tradition. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_00I'll be part of the club. I get a sticker.
SPEAKER_02Uh, what's the question? Uh, if this was put in front of you, would you have another? If I knew what it was. Yeah, as long as I know what it is.
SPEAKER_01If the can was set in front of you.
SPEAKER_00Honestly, if you put the can. With a label and a description and a it would honestly make me less likely to drink this beer. The can? Yeah. I don't care for that.
SPEAKER_02You don't like the Royce? I don't believe you. No. Poor Bird.
SPEAKER_00It's fine. They can do whatever they want, I guess, and it's legally distinct, so they're probably not going to get sued.
SPEAKER_03They don't have funding to sue anybody.
SPEAKER_00I'm not a big fan of the like sued.
SPEAKER_03Brad, how dare you?
SPEAKER_00In general, I'm not a big fan of the like adultified version of beloved children's thing.
SPEAKER_03That's fair.
SPEAKER_00Just like in general. So if you put the can in front of me, I would actually be less likely to drink it. But yeah, I'd have another one. Okay. As long as I knew what it was. And there wasn't a can present.
SPEAKER_02Phil. If I set one of these in front of you and you as long as you knew what it was.
SPEAKER_01Let's let's back that up a minute. This is Phil. So if you set a beard in front of Phil, accurate. Yes, of course.
SPEAKER_03Uh I'm a I'm a yes to it. Would you have a second?
SPEAKER_01Yes. Okay. There's another one sitting right there that I might have.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I I kind of want a little bit more too. I I do really like this bear. I think this would be a good crusher on a hot summer day. When it's cold?
SPEAKER_01Yes. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02The warmer it gets, the bigger. Yeah, you gotta be the finish isn't as good. You gotta be Ross with a six-pack of uh shandies on a back porch. Never mind, that's a that's an inside joke. Uh okay. 30 minutes. Uh 30 minutes, yeah. I was fine. It's all right. Uh that's gonna do it for this beer. Uh, if you want to know more about uh junkyard brewing company, you can head over to their website at junkyardbeer.com. Again, this was Bert the Hurt uh by Junkyard Brewing Company in Moorhead, Minnesota. I kind of wanna know if we can get this like locally because you got this up in uh North Dakota. North Dakota. Yeah, you're not I just like reverted into my like North Dakota. Why did I do that? I'm not from up there. Uh okay, so this is also doubling as our season wrap episode. So everybody's getting a little bit everything in this one, which is uh so before we do the before we strike scrape the bottom of the barrel, uh, I just wanted to talk a little bit about uh this season and kind of the things that we've done. And it's kinda it's really been a weird season, like uh like each of the other seasons we've done. I feel like we came into this with like big ideas and then life happened, and then we've kind of had to do some adjusting and stuff like that. But I think overall it was really good. Um we talked a lot in the in the fall about um we did like world building, we talked about you okay with her?
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_02Uh we talked about bastions, we did several beers. Brett and I did a uh Halloween special where we uh where we talked about or no, we didn't we didn't really talk much D D in that actually. We struggled through Call of Duty's Well Hey, it has a lot of views, okay? People like watching us play Call of Duty.
SPEAKER_03Uh how do we play this again?
SPEAKER_02Uh actually, my my favorite episode of the fall was our Christmas special. I think, honest to God, that was one of our best episodes we've ever done. It was a lot of fun. I really enjoyed Damon leading the uh the Christmas songs and we put alignment chart. Like now I remember that episode. Really well-rounded episode. It was great. Like, I am surprised when I like go look at analytics and people are still listening to that episode. Like, it still pops up, people going back and listening to it.
SPEAKER_00Maybe these people are people who are actually stuck in the beloved Christmas movie It's Christmas Every Day.
SPEAKER_02Which is like Groundhog Day for Christmas? Yeah. Okay. Boy, the plot ripoff.
SPEAKER_01Isn't that like a version of that that Disney did with the uh three little kid ducks do Yui Dewey and Louie?
SPEAKER_02Did we not talk about this during the Christmas episode?
SPEAKER_01I feel like we talked about this during the Christmas episode. We probably did.
SPEAKER_03That is an that is an episode.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's in the middle of one of the one of the Christmas story Mickey Mouse things. And they're little shits. They are, they're mean to Donald.
SPEAKER_02Uh and then this spring, Phil and I took a uh a deep dive into Candela Obscura, where we did a whole bunch of videos and podcasts where we talked about basically dived dove into the ins and outs of playing Candela, which I think was really cool and something that we're planning on doing in the future with other systems. So, did you have any thoughts on Candela?
SPEAKER_01Like, no, I think that whole session or that kind of segment, I guess, was a lot of fun to kind of dig into that, talk about you know, something still in the TTRPG realm that isn't just DD. Yeah. Because you know, we can hit on some other crowds and things too, and excited to look at what we're doing next season. Did we decide on that?
SPEAKER_02Well, we haven't really locked down all the things. Uh so we don't have like particular like topics for podcasts yet. So we're gonna keep doing the opening crack. Uh and that's probably not gonna change very much.
SPEAKER_00The way that that translates is we don't have any ideas. No, we have a lot of ideas. We have a lot of ideas for the problem.
SPEAKER_02Exactly.
SPEAKER_00That's the problem. Uh we don't have you know topics for podcasts per se. We have the concepts of a plan is what we have.
SPEAKER_02Uh yeah, so we don't we don't have a lot of the the podcast planned out yet, that part planned out, but we are going to do like every other week like YouTube episodes where we're going to have like a a question, like a TTRPG question that Brett and Phil and I answer. And so like that's the whole episode. It's like five to ten minutes. Here's the question for that episode, and we're gonna dive into that. So that's that's half the episodes. Well, that's half the episodes there, a third of them or a quarter of them are gonna be opening cracks, so there'll only leave a quarter of podcast episodes left. There's not really gonna be a ton of them in there. So yeah, we'll see. So if you have ideas that you think we should cover, let us know. Yeah, please do. Uh Barts and Barrels at Barts and Barrels at gmail.com. You can also message us on any of our 9,000 social media channels. Mailbags? Well, see, I I uh I think the mailbags are like those weekly episodes now, though, because we're taking mailbag questions and breaking them up into their own little episodes.
SPEAKER_03So if you have questions for us for those episodes, send them our way because I think it would be fun to make Ross answer one of those questions on the fly.
SPEAKER_02I think I just got to the point where I was tired of YouTube bitch and I had too much power, and so I'm just like, nope, we're just gonna do them all out in the open then. One per episode. You got plenty of time to think about it. It's more fun when we don't make it. We might we might throw a couple of mailbags in there like that too. I still think it'd be fun to have a guest on for a mailbag. Yeah. Because it is pretty fun to do rapid fire questions like that, which it has not been that bad.
SPEAKER_01So we just like to give you shit.
SPEAKER_02It says the one with my computer. Well, you as soon as you lose, brother. Um, I don't know. Any other thoughts? I I'm I don't want to overpromise anything that we're gonna do. I think the the hope is we just have like a full season for the first time in a couple years.
SPEAKER_03Moral of the story, we're not going anywhere. We're still doing this.
SPEAKER_02We'll be back. Season five. Can you believe okay? That's that's one last thing before we move on to the scraping the bottom of the builder. Did you think we were gonna make it a season five? We're gonna hit a hundred episodes this fall. Are we going to? Yeah, we should. Oh, that's sweet.
SPEAKER_03I wasn't I didn't even consider a season two when we started. I was like, we'll do this for a couple weeks. We've been doing this for three years.
SPEAKER_01Season two. We had planned though. We knew what our episodes are gonna be.
SPEAKER_02We did absolutely so many topics are like we gotta do this one and this one and this one and this one. I just remember how many we recorded so many class reviews. We recorded three pilots before we finally decided, yeah, this is good enough to do. At that point, I was like, if this is every episode, we are so screwed because we're never gonna get anything off the ground here. So, anyway, uh I'm looking forward to season five. I appreciate you guys. It's been a blast, and I'm excited to keep doing it. So all right, scraping it, scrape the bottom of the barrel.
SPEAKER_03What we got, Brett? Speaking of power, this is the one time Ross does not have the ability to pick. So he's a nice one. Pull one from the bottom of the barrel, and it is what are you reading? Dibzong one first. Oh shit. Um, and audiobooks count for this. Uh because uh, of course, currently listening to Dungeon Crawler Carl. Yeah!
SPEAKER_01What book are you on?
SPEAKER_03Uh I'm still finishing up book two. Okay. So I've got a long ways to go.
SPEAKER_00How many books are there?
SPEAKER_03Until next month. Oh, yeah. Who writes today?
SPEAKER_02April 25th. Matt Dinnerman.
SPEAKER_03Uh he I just sent you guys a thing on Instagram, by the way. But he announced that he's doing like ten books. But the like the ninth and tenth book are like half books. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Like nine books, but it's too big to include in one book. Yeah. So nine and ten. So it's like when they take a movie and split it in half. Yeah, that's a lie. He's doing it just to create a clip.
SPEAKER_03Twilight movement here. And we will see every layer of the dungeon, supposedly.
SPEAKER_01Allegedly.
SPEAKER_03But he said that phrase was very carefully worded.
SPEAKER_02Allegedly. I just finished The Butcher's Masquerade, so don't be giving me this allegedly level crap because Masquerade.
SPEAKER_01Well, I'll go next. So I'm I'm currently listening, or I'm reading This Inevitable Ruin, which is book seven, and I have just started it. I got stuck with a bunch of home stuff and I have not been reading it recently, but that is the one that I've just started. Supposedly some stuff happens that tells you where things are at, but we'll see. I'm not through it yet.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Well, let's continue the theme here. I'm on book five, uh, which is Eye of the Bedlam Bride, and uh I just started that right before you guys came over. So I'm not oh, I'm through the the prologue. I'm not through chapter one yet. I want to have some really fun mechanics in it. You told me on an episode where we discussed Dungeon Crawler Carl that I was going to cry at the end of the butcher's masquerade. And while I can confirm that I did not cry, I had some pretty heavy feels at the end of that book. Thank you. Like it was it was intense. Like I did not expect this is like these two guys have no idea what you're doing. No idea. Everybody out there that's read the book knows exactly what I'm talking about. Everybody else is just like wandering in the woods right now. Uh we'll probably come back to that trick or Carl. Damon, what are you reading right now? Okay, side conversation. Yes.
SPEAKER_00Because we haven't had any of those this episode. I don't think that I've I don't think that I've ever cried from reading a book. Really? I don't think so. And I was talking um my wife and I and and somebody else were talking a couple of weeks ago, and they were talking about um that there's a book that they have both read or were reading, and that it like it creeped them out. And like they were like really like like literally sort of like scared, really, as a re as a result of reading it. And I said, like, I don't think I've ever been scared from reading a book. I don't think that I'm as good at reading things as uh as other people.
SPEAKER_02So I I might be in the same boat as that. Like I don't know, is it just like it's a book? Yeah, it's just like something like it's it you can tell it's a story because I'm holding this thing. Yeah, so it's like I can disassociate from it a little bit. I find it a little different than listening to an audiobook though. Like listening to an audiobook, I feel like I'm able to dive a little deeper, maybe because I'm not focusing on like the reading part. I don't I don't know.
SPEAKER_00I feel as though I've definitely found passages moving, sure, yeah, you know, or important or particularly poignant or meaningful in some way, shape, or form. I don't think it's ever but scared, I don't know that like some sort of you know, physical maybe a chuckle every once in a while.
SPEAKER_03Like I get tense in books, like I can feel like my body being tense, but not I don't know that scared I've ever felt though.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I also don't feel like I read the right genre of books to be scared. Maybe if I read horror books, it it may be a little different, but this was not a horror book. Was it like a mystery murder or something?
SPEAKER_01I don't think I've ever read anything that would bring me to that emotion because I just don't enjoy that feeling in general. So I don't think I would read anything that would cause that. I definitely remember the first passage of a book that I ever cried at, embarrassingly.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Uh New Moon, the second uh Twilight book.
SPEAKER_00What?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you what now you start flipping through it and it just goes like month by month where like nothing is happening in Bella's life because she's depressed. Like as I was just flipping through like that, like knowing what was happening, that was the first time I recall like actually coming to tears at a book. So like it just is January.
SPEAKER_00It just like flips through months where like her life just passed.
SPEAKER_01And that was yeah, like that for me, that's the first I can remember.
SPEAKER_00So like I would see that and think, oh, like that's a really cool way of like expressing that.
SPEAKER_01It got me, so yeah, I I remember that vividly.
SPEAKER_02Interesting.
SPEAKER_01At any rate, I'm embarrassing.
SPEAKER_00I've been reading. Well, have you been reading? Yes. Uh I've that's either beyond midnight or after midnight or before midnight. Something about midnight. Okay. It's by Paul Dorian. Paul Dorian. It's uh it's kind of uh uh it's I don't even know. It's not like a murder mystery. It's kind of like contemporary noir almost. Uh the main character is a game warden in Maine. And like he has a friend who's been in prison and is being released from prison under some sort of mysterious circumstances, and he's trying to also track down someone who uh shot and nearly killed a wolf uh as well. I don't know. Unrelated? As of this point. As of now, yes. But you know, I don't know why we're doing both of these things. Right. You know? Uh sounds like it could have been two books.
SPEAKER_02But it's one, so maybe it was, and the publisher was like, oh uh coming back to Harry Potter, so I I had some feels in it. Not not like during the story so much. Like like even when spoiler alert, like even when people died in like book seven, like I don't never had like this wave of like, oh my god, so-and-so died, or like when Dumbledore died in book five, whatever book would have been. Yeah, but like yes, I had feels but did but did Dobby, yeah. I think I had more feels finishing book seven because it felt like the closing of a chapter, like it had been such like going to like the midnight release of the books and getting the books, and like such a large part of like that early. And you had to wait for like multiple years in between books, and it's like what we're doing right now for Dungeon Crawler. That's true. So anyway, I that was my feeling on Harry Potter. Uh you brought that up, and I was like, Well, I don't think I had like emotions like during the book per se, but like definitely like ending that last book. Like it had some feels about that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I think I just always even when I'm reading for fun, there's a part of me that just always thinks of reading as work. Sure. And so I just I'm just I don't get as emotionally into it, I think, as other folks.
SPEAKER_02That makes sense. Uh because we're on this topic. What's what's like you can have multiple favorites, but like what's one of your favorite books you've ever read?
SPEAKER_01I really for the longest time my favorite book has always been The Hobbit. I just really love the adventure of The Hobbit.
SPEAKER_02I I like those books, but I struggle with Tolkien's like attention to detail sometimes. Like I I get caught up like I I need pace. And it's like there are times in those books where it's like I don't need 12 pages on what's at the Hobbit's dinner table or whatever you're talking about. I just want to get on to the next thing.
SPEAKER_01I feel like it's one of the first books that when I was like getting to an age where I really loved reading that I remember really enjoying. Um so for the longest time it's been my favorite book. Have I read it in a decade? Probably not. Sure. Yeah, honestly. So it's not something I ever go back and reread, but it's just something that sticks out in my mind. Sure.
SPEAKER_03Right. Uh Ender's Game. Great. The whole series. Yeah. Those are great books. Like the the inner mon I love uh a good book with a a lot of inner monologue in their head of like their thought process and battle strategy and specifically for that book. Sure.
SPEAKER_00Damn it. I'll give you three. Oh Slaughterhouse 5. Uh Catch 22.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_00It just kind of works with my sense of humor. And Animal Farm. But I also like I haven't I don't think I've ever reread any of those.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, for sure. Uh Animal Farm is one of my favorite books. I think there was just something about like in high school, like I I was a history nerd, so it's like I made those connections pretty quick. Like I I remember that being like a class, like during one of the English classes, like okay, like we've read three chapters of this. Like, has anybody drawn conclusions? Like what historical stuff? And it's like I knew that it was the Bolshevik evolution and like who the characters were representing and stuff like that. And so I I enjoyed that. Um I like a lot of like nonfiction books, like one of my favorite books. Brett and I are big into space things, uh, as you're wearing your master hat over there. But but probably in my top five books is uh Gene Grant, who was the uh flight director at NASA during the Apollo missions. His biography, which is titled Failure's Not an Option, is one of my favorite books of all time. I even wrote a letter to him and he wrote back, and that's framed and hanging in my office at work. So uh it's just like he he like goes into depth, like especially like around like Apollo 1 when the astronauts died and Apollo 13, where they were like on the brink of disaster, and like he tells you everything about those those moments and all that. Um and then yeah, I I I think Dungeon Crawler Carl is probably rising up the ranks quickly as I go through it. Yeah, I I we'll I'll give a final determination when we get to the end, but I I kind of feel more drawn to it than I did Harry Potter, to be honest with you, at this point.
SPEAKER_01Have you seen Dinnerman's interview where he talks about that he's a horror writer?
SPEAKER_02No.
SPEAKER_01So just to expect to come out at the end. Okay. That that's actually his style.
SPEAKER_03So interesting. I will say you're at a different stage in life now than you were reading Harry Potter. That's very true.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01I really enjoyed like the did you guys ever read the uh Shadow Hunter series, like City of Bones? Oh yeah, some of them. Yeah, I really enjoyed those two, because it kind of introduces like that. I mean, it was before I was playing DD, right? But it was, I feel like intro to some of that, like the Fey Realm and Demons, things like that. So it was interesting.
SPEAKER_02Um the uh like uh Ready Player One, Ready Player Two, uh Ernest, Ernest Klein? Ernest Klein. Ernest goes to camp. Ernest noes to prison. I remember watching those movies, but not not Ernest Goes to Prison. Was that one? I think so. Was it one? I mean Ernest did everything.
SPEAKER_01What did he do at camp? Landed him in prison.
SPEAKER_03What happens at being camp stage?
SPEAKER_02Uh yeah, I think that's it. What's that? Ernest. Yeah, I think it's Ernest Klein, yeah. And he also wrote a book called Armada, which is really good and very applicable now. Like the whole premise of the book is like the the military takes kids essentially out of school and like puts them what they think they're playing a video game to fight aliens, and then almost like a little bit of like what happens in Ender's game. It sounds like Ender's game, yeah. And and then they find out that you know they've been fighting monsters all along, and it's like how we're currently using drones and stuff to fight wars, and it's like all very parallel and familiar in a lot of ways. So Ender's game is a ripoff.
SPEAKER_03Which one came first?
SPEAKER_02I'm sure Ender's game did, I would guess, but I don't know. When did come out? Ender's game?
SPEAKER_01Which one? Ender's game. I thought the book was older. I don't know.
SPEAKER_00Before or after the hatchet. I remember reading the hatchet in school. Same. I remember being asked to read the hatchet in school.
SPEAKER_03I actually reread that not too long ago. Did you? Yeah. Uh I mean it's it's a like a middle school book, but it's still good.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Enders Came came out January 15th, 1985. I was thinking of the 80s, but it wasn't true. Okay.
SPEAKER_01Okay, when does all the hatchet called?
SPEAKER_03Alternate endings of the hatchet? There are alternate endings. There's more books. What? They're like, what happened if like a choose your own adventure hatchet? No, no, no, no. Not choose your own adventure, but like Parallel Universe. If he didn't if he didn't escape.
SPEAKER_00Is he a bouncer in any of these parallel universe books?
SPEAKER_02He is now. On Roy. The Ice Palace. Uh Did anybody have to read Beowulf in high school? We did not. Part of it, yeah. God, that's like old English style books. Like, that's worse than Shakespeare. Like, that was my god. Oh, yep. That's not when we read it. DTSD is coming back from trying to read that. It's like looking back, Macbeth, right up our alley. I kind of want to go back and like, eh, there's some themes there we could use in some D and D games, potentially. You know, just the witches, right, right up front in that book. But Ender's game came out in eighty five.
SPEAKER_03Yep.
SPEAKER_00So But when did the hatchet come out?
SPEAKER_03Ooh.
SPEAKER_00That's I think in its older. That's the pivotal question of this episode.
SPEAKER_02Well Well he's looking that up. What what's uh not oh yes eighty six really interesting uh couldn't have been a ripoff, it would have already been like written, just not published yet. Yeah. What's a a book that you read in high school that like sticks with you? We can't use Animal Farm because we've already said Animal Farm is one of the things.
SPEAKER_00I didn't read Animal Farm in high school.
SPEAKER_02Oh, you didn't read it in high school? I didn't read it in ninth grade. That's what we did too. Um so book memorable book from high school that we were all forced to read some for something. Don't remember too long ago. Oh, you don't have one? No, gotcha.
SPEAKER_00I did not like reading.
SPEAKER_02Oh, fair.
SPEAKER_00Um to kill a mocking bird.
SPEAKER_02Oh, great. And the the play.
SPEAKER_00So good.
SPEAKER_03Such a good I can't think of any that Death of a Salesman.
SPEAKER_00I could tell you a short story. Okay. Um uh last peak of last piece of steak, I think it's called. Uh it's by Jack London. Oh, okay. Um and it's um like a short story was about all the attention that I had for reading um in high school. And it's a it's about a boxer, is an older boxer, and he's preparing for his last fight. And he's he's a massive underdog, essentially, from what I recall. And he's eating like his pre-match meal, which is steak. And he eats the steak, uh, and he gets to the end of it, and he just feels as though he needs like he came up one piece short. Like he just he wanted one, he like he just feels as though he wants one more bite of steak to like be like fully satisfied. And then he gets into the match, and he's actually like doing well and coming out on top, and he goes to sort of give his knockout blow, and it just it cut it just it almost knocks the guy out, but it doesn't quite because he didn't get that last piece of steak. He just didn't he just didn't quite have interesting what he needed. Huh. Spoiler, I agree.
SPEAKER_01Like, what is that story trying to teach, though?
SPEAKER_02I just remember thinking it was buy two steaks. You can always take some home, but you just you need that last bite.
SPEAKER_00Um yeah, I just remember thinking like, oh, like that's a cool like that was a cool it clearly stuck with you. Like if you remember it. That's good. Eat your veggies. And it was vivid and you know, in some way, but sure.
SPEAKER_03Nice.
SPEAKER_00Do you have one, Brad?
SPEAKER_03I don't. I was trying to think uh I mean like Harry Potter, but that's not one that we read for school. Sure.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I don't know. I'll just think about that one.
SPEAKER_02I we read um Night, which is a holo a book about the Holocaust. Um, it's a very vivid detail about the Holocaust. Again, going back to history, like I really enjoyed those books because like it's context and perspective and stuff like that. Uh but that book in particular, I think we read that right, and then we watched Schindler's List. There's no night movie, but it was like part of a bigger thing we were doing, like learning in history and stuff like that. Uh that one does stick with me. Like, there's very I won't go into that here because they're they're not great, but like I still remember like passages that we would talk about in that book of like some of the atrocities and things like that that they would do to to uh the Jewish people and stuff like that.
SPEAKER_01So I remember in high school, I don't remember what school it was or what script they were doing, but I remember in one act, one of the years when we were at state, we always did comedy, so that was just what my school did. But some of the schools would pick to do a drama, and one that stuck out in particular was about like Auschwitz concentration camp and just like the things that they did and that they portrayed and that were so moving, like even as a high schooler, and I feel like you know emotionally I was not like at the maturity where I am. Well, I mean I'm still not there completely, right? But hey, no, sorry, it's fine. Way better than I was in high school. But even at that time, I felt like how moving that was and how well they like captured that, and that I I don't know if it was based off of that book or something like that, but that I can still remember a lot of what they did for that because it was that moving. So what about Poe?
SPEAKER_03I was just thinking Poe.
SPEAKER_01Did you guys do any Poe in high school? Poe the Raven Nevermore. Nevermore.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's the one that was coming to my head.
SPEAKER_01Those are my two favorites, Nevermore and Telltale Heart, which I know are popular ones, but those are my favorites.
SPEAKER_03Sure.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. I I remember like Telltale Heart. I remember thinking, oh, like that's you know, like the concept of it was cool. It is. Uh yeah.
SPEAKER_01I'm building a Candelic uh adventure around it assignment. Nice.
SPEAKER_02Nice. It's fitting. I'm not surprised. Well done, sir. Thanks. Uh, any other book thoughts before we get out of here?
SPEAKER_00Uh, yeah, we should just ban them. That's fine. Just ban them.
SPEAKER_02It always turns out. So coming back to history. Coming back to PBS. No, no, I'm just kidding. Sorry. Too soon. Uh, all right. Well, let's uh get out of here. That's gonna do it for this episode of Bards and Barrels. You can listen to past episodes of the show anywhere podcasts can be found. You can also follow us on Facebook, Instagram, threads, uh, TikTok, YouTube, you name it. You can follow us at Bards and Barrels. All the places. Yeah, all the places. Uh we'll see you in season five, uh, coming probably sooner than you think. We'll catch you later.
